Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda
by FloridaVic
Summary: My take on what Walt might have said/did when Vic was unconscious . Walt feels badly for the way he has treated Vic in the past, but will he have the courage to tell her if and when she wakes up from the gunshot-related coma? S6. Walt/Vic ship.
1. Chapter 1

**I OWN NOTHING...This is my attempt to " fill inn the blanks" when Walt is waiting for Vic to wake up . This is my first fan fic in a long time, so please be kind. Thanks.**

Walt's heart was pounding in his throat and he opened the passenger door to the Bronco. As gently as possible, he loaded an unconscious Vic into the passenger seat .Although he managed to slow down the bleeding with a tourniquet, but Vic had already lost copious amounts of blood. He slammed the door of the passenger side of the Bronco, and hopped into the driver's side.

With a turn of the key, the old Bronco leapt to life. Walt pressed the gas pedal to the floor and spun out of the Gilbert driveway and onto the county road heading towards Durant.

He picked up the radio on the dashboard

"Durant General Hospital, this is Sherriff Longmire. I have a gunshot victim in my truck and I am heading your way. "

"Ten-four, Sherriff" a disembodied voice replied.

Tree branches hit Walt's windshield.

"Shit, "he swore as he swerved to avoid the trees.

Beside him, Vic moaned. Carefully, Walt used his other hand to gently pick up Vic's limp wrist.

"Stay with me, Vic. I can't lose you now- I WON'T lose you now. "He muttered under his breath as he drove on autopilot towards the hospital in the center of town.

As he drove, images of the past year floated into his mind. He recalled that scene in the alley when he basically told Vic that she meant nothing to him. It was a lie, and it was a lie that he wished he had never uttered.

"I'm sorry, Vic. I am such a shit. You scare me, and how I feel about you scares me even more, "he muttered to her as he squeezed her hand.

Donna meant nothing to him. He admits to himself that Donna was a distraction. Since she initially did not like him, he felt turned on by that challenge and pursued her relentlessly. But as they spent more time together, he replied that the psychiatrist was _not_ his type at all. Unlike Vic, the doctor kept important details of her life from Walt. He did not know that Donna had any children until he arrested her son for an alleged trespassing on her property. Vic had called him out, saying " _How well do you really know Donna, Walt?"_

He didn't know Donna. And he didn't care to know her. She was a distraction, albeit a beautiful distraction. Walt knew that his involvement with Donna led Vic into the arms of both Travis and Eammon. While he had been shocked at first to learn of Vic's pregnancy, he really could not blame her. After all, he had been the one who tried to drown his love for Vic with other women.

"You always know what's good for me .You know all of me, and love me nonetheless." He told the unconscious Vic.

She moaned.

"We're almost there. Hang on, Vic, hang on. "

As he drove, he vowed that somehow he would make it up to Vic for all the heartache he has caused her over the past year. Vic Moretti, besides being his deputy and police partner, is also his best friend and soul mate.

But first, he had to get her to the hospital.

Walt watched helplessly as the medical staff took Vic into the trauma center. Dejectedly, he followed them into the hospital and found a seat in the uncomfortable chairs in the waiting room outside the trauma surgery center. Looking around, he saw few people. He settled his long legs into a plastic-covered chair and prepared to wait.

Vic had lost a lot of blood. He did not take the time to look at her wound to see if he could see the bullet that Chance fired into her; his main concern was controlling the bleeding enough to keep her alive until they got to Durant General.

"She's pregnant" were the only words he'd uttered as Vic was rushed into surgery. He wished that Vic had told him about the pregnancy herself, and he could not figure out why she felt like she _could not_ tell him. But all that was moot- all he cared about was that Vic would survive the surgery.

"Sherriff how is she," Ferg's familiar voice inquired.

Walt looked up.  
"She's in surgery right now." he answered.

"Want me to stay?" his deputy asked.

"Nope "Walt said.

Two hours later, the surgeon poked his head in the waiting room. Sherriff, she's alive and in recovery. We got the bullet. I'm sorry to say, sir, that the fetus didn't make it. "

Walt nodded.

"When can I see her?"

"We'll get her into a private room in an hour after we stabilize her. We also want Deputy Moretti's Ob/Gyn to examine her. We will let you know when you can come see her. And Sheriff, we are sorry about the loss of your baby."

"My baby? "Walt said

"Uh, aren't you the father?"

"Nope"

The surgeon's cheeks colored.

"Uh, I'll come back and let you know when you can see her."

Walt sat down. He _wished_ that the baby had been his child. But, unless he did something, the likelihood of he and Vic ever becoming more than boss and subordinate would decrease.

He loved her. For the first time since his wife's death, he loved another woman. And he _could not and would not lose her._ He lost Martha, and almost lost Cady and Henry. But he _could not_ survive if Vic died.

Walt put his face in his hands and wept.

"Sherriff, you can go in and see her now. She's unconscious, but stable. "

Walt wiped his tear-stained face with the back of his rough hand and stood up. His knees creaked as he followed the surgeon down a long corridor. After what seemed like hours, the surgeon opened a door to one of the small hospital rooms.

"She's getting blood transfusions. I think that the fact that her pregnancy caused her body to have an abundance of red blood cells saved her life. "

Walt nodded. He only cared that Vic pulled through the surgery

When he opened the door to Vic's hospital room, he was greeted with the beeping of medical machines. Vic lay still on the narrow hospital bed, a breathing tube in her nose. An IV pole with a bag of dark red blood hung from the side of her bed. Walt walked up to her bedside and sat in the chair next to the IV pole. Vic's face looked almost as pale as the sheets on the bed. Carefully he brushed a stray strand of her blonde hair back from her forehead. He heard her labored breathing and his brow furrowed in concern.

Carefully he took Vic's IV-free hand in both of his hands. His long fingers enveloped Vic's small hand and he gently massaged her fingers. Her fingers felt cold to the touch, but he realized that her blood pressure was dangerously low. Loss of blood will cause that side effect. Want resisted the urge to gently take her in his arms and hold her close; IV, nose tube and all.

"Vic. I'm here. I won't leave you. Not now. Not ever. "

Still holding onto Vic's hand, he reflected on the past two years together, and wondered how he could have selfishly kept his love for his deputy to himself. He knew from the first time that Victoria Moretti walked into his office that she would play a huge part in his destiny.

He loved Martha, and part of him will always love his wife. Yet his love for Vic is different. Martha complimented him while Vic challenges him to grow into a better cop and a better man. He knows that he has let her down by refusing to grow. Martha may have accepted and loved status-quo Walt, but Vic pushes him to be a better friend, colleague, boss and

She scared and fascinated him at the same time. Vic reminded him of a young wild mare- hauntingly beautiful, strong and fiercely independent.

Like Martha, Vic is loyal. She'd proven her loyalty when she stayed with the department after that horrible exchange of words in the alley when he was still involved with Donna. She reminded him "What _you do_ DOES _impact me, Walt"_ , and he'd cruelly disregarded her true statement. Vic is, among her other good qualities, the finest cop he'd ever known, and he regrets taking her for granted all these years. She'd had an opportunity to leave when her now ex-husband took the job transfer but she elected to stay in Wyoming with _his department._

Walt felt guilty about Vic's marriage to Sean ending, although she'd told him repeatedly that the marriage had been rocky from the beginning. Although he and Vic tried to play down Sean's jealousy and suspicion of the nature between Walt and his beautiful deputy, the strong sexual attraction between them had been a constant presence in the office and in the field. He knew that Branch, especially, resented Vic's 'special relationship' with Walt.

At first he blamed his hiding of his feelings for Vic on the fact that he was not over Martha's murder but as he spent more time with Vic, he gradually realized that his wife would want him to learn to love again.

Professionally, she's always 'had his back' in the field and in the community. He closed his eyes and smiled when he thought of how lovely Vic looked at the pre-election party years ago. Even now, she has his back. As Vic stated in the alley, his life impacts hers, and she's been supportive throughout this wrongful-death lawsuit that the Connelly estate filed against him.

"You sure do clean up nicely, Vic." he told her.

Another memory came up of the two of them sitting at that bar in Arizona sipping beer. Vic had worn her hair down that evening, and Walt found himself wanting to caress the blonde locks to see if they felt as soft as they looked. When Vic took a swig of his beer, he felt his face flush.

"Vic _, that's my beer"_

He smiled as he remembered how Vic showed him how to use the key-card to unlock his hotel room. He'd made light of the situation, but what he wanted to ask Vic was "Why _don't I stay with you in your room?"_ Walt shook his head, thankful in hindsight. That would have been a bad idea, as they discovered later that Gorski had been stalking Vic and sent a photo of Walt and she together outside the motel door.


	2. Chapter 2

"Sean sure thought you and I were an item." he said to Vic.

Outside the door to her hospital room Walt heard noises. He did not know how long he had been sitting by Vic's bedside, nor did he care. He'd left her when she was vulnerable too many times in the past, and he would _not_ make that mistake again. If he's learned anything from working with Vic, it is that she's a good friend. As a matter of fact, Vic is a much better _person_ than Walt is and that is part of what scares him.

Beneath her tough-girl persona, Vic has a heart of gold. Walt remembers how after Cady's auto accident, Vic sat with him by his daughter's bedside. Without saying anything Vic Moretti _can_ be silent when she chooses to do so} Vic sat with Walt until his daughter awoke. He remembered the gentle way Vic put her hand on his shoulder—not in a sexual way, but instead a tender, nurturing way that brought him comfort in one of his darkest moments.

A young, overweight nurse put her head in the doorway.

"Sherriff, I need to take Vic's vitals. "He said

"Ok," Walt stood up and stretched. "Is there a coffee machine here?"

"Right down the hallway and to your left, "she said as she stuck a thermometer in Vic's mouth.

"Thanks."

Walt followed his nose down to the lounge and saw the coffee machine. Digging into his pants pockets, he found some change and made his selection. A glance at the wall clock told him that it was well past midnight.

He sipped the coffee and burnt his tongue

"Damn, "he cursed. He really needed a beer, but the hospital's no-alcohol policy precluded that request. His stomach rumbled, and he realized he had not eaten anything since a quick breakfast in the cabin early this morning.

He walked down past Vic's room until he found the nurses' station.

"Can I borrow someone's cell phone?" he asked the young nurse at the desk.

"Sure" He fished an IPhone from the pocket of his scrubs and handed it to Walt.

Walt dialed the number to The Red Pony

Henry answered on the third ring.

"Henry, it's Walt. I'm at the hospital with Vic. "

"How is she doing?" his best friend inquired.

"Stable but still unconscious. Listen, can you make me a burger and fries and have someone deliver it to me here?"

"I will do more than that. I will deliver the meal to you myself. What is Vic's hospital room number?"

Walt told him, and henry said he would be at the hospital with the food in an hour.

"Thanks, Henry, "Walt said.

Walt handed the phone back to the nurse and walked back to Vic's room. When he entered, Vic was alone in her hospital bed. The nurse had taken the bag of blood products and replaced it with a bag of clear saline solution.

"I see you got all the blood you need, "he said as he took Vic's hand in his own. It felt warmer. Her looked closer at her face and noticed that some pick had returned to her cheeks. Gently he touched her cheek and felt tears in his own eyes.

"You are beautiful, and I am sorry that I've not told you that until now. I've been a damn fool for not seeing that the person I love has been literally at my side for years. "


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N I am writing this as it comes to me. I think of questions that S6 didn't answer regarding WaltXVic , and I try to answer them .**

 **Thanks for reading .**

A knock on the door announced Henry's arrival. The Cheyenne handed Walt a bag of food, and he immediately opened the bag and bit into the sandwich.

"How are YOU holding up, Walt?" Henry asked his best friend, concern filling his brown eyes.

"Tired. " Walt replied

" Maybe you should go home and get some sleep. I can stay here until closing time at the bar, " Henry suggested.

" Nope." Walt answered.

Henry pulled up at chair and sat next to Walt.

" Has she awakened yet?" he asked, nodding at the sleeping Vic.

Walt wiped his mouth with a wadded up paper napkin.

" Nope. "

" And you have been here the entire time?"

" Yup"

" Walt, may I offer some advice?"

" Sure" Walt said, adding more French fries into his already full mouth.

" You and I may be an asymptote, but you and Vic are not. Let her get close to you. You and Vic have been leading parallel lives for too long. This is not what is meant to be. Your destiny and Vic's are meant to intersect. Do not push her away ."

Walt swallowed his food.

" If you are sure that do not need me, I will be on my way back to the bar. Remember the asymptote, Walt. Do not let Vic get away from you. "

Henry stood up and turned towards the door.

Walt turned around and looked at his friend.  
" Henry?"

" Yes."

" I won't let her get away this time. "

Henry smiled.

" Good night, Walt. "

Walt wiped his hands with the remaining napkins and grabbed Vic's hand.

He kissed her hand.

"I love you Vic"


End file.
